All people who know me could say i'm one of the most loving persons in the world, they have all seen me give all i have and all i am to those i have had relationships with. Some of them even say i give too much, and coming to think of it, maybe that is what happened to me with this guy.
I had just ended a relationship in which i suffered a lot, even though i gave my best, this person betrayed me in all possible ways and left me with nothing at all. I was so hurt. I didn't plan it, but i think i reacted as a pendulum, going from one end to another drastically, being mean to him to avoid him being mean to me.
I'm not proud of it, what i did was wrong, i know, but i swear i didn't plan it that way, and i didn't even know i was being mean till now.
Now i know he has been reading this, and sent me a message with all kinds of silly childish insults, but i understand, he's hurt, i can't expect him to be nice. he tried to make me think our friendship broke cause his gf wanted to protect him from me, hahaha, she didn't even know anything that had happened when she interfered, but, you know what?? I really give a damn haha. I said what i wanted to say and took out of my soul bad feelings i was having, and amazingly enough, something else happened: reading his funny message made me forget i hated him.
So I'm relieved now. There's no hate in my heart anymore. Now i can turn the page and live happily with my loved ones and my lion king.
It was all meant to be this way, i like to think. Perhaps, karma does exist and this guy had to pay being mean to someone by dating me, cause he has also been mean, he shouldn't forget about it. Perhaps we had to live such a messy relationship to find happiness just ahead, after all, if he hadn't been unhappy, he wouldn't have needed her and found her in that very moment, and for me, thanx to that awful experience with him i decided to stop looking for men and learn to enjoy loneliness, which later helped me find the most wonderful man in the world and build a strong healthy relationship with him.
And if it wasn't meant that way, then it was just a happy coincidence with a happy ending for both of us.
Today i can finally say i wish them both the best together =D
